Thankfulness entails honesty. Why pretend when God knows the deepest parts of our hearts? The moment I realized there was no such thing as a secret between me and God, my awe of Him increased, along with my love for Him. I breathed in at that moment the truth that God loves me, as is, and there is no room for pretending with Him.
I hope you will be encouraged by this guest post which was written a few weeks ago by the most amazing woman I’ve ever known, my mom.
Thankful……last Monday when you posted about being thankful on Mondays, I announced that I was joining you in giving thanks. Well…..I did…..in the morning. Then something happened that brought out the upset, offended, bitchy woman in me. It took me until Wednesday morning to get over myself.
I have been fighting a second battle with breast cancer all within 2 years of the first time I was diagnosed. I am not afraid to die…..whether I am in the body or out of the body I am always alive in Jesus Christ. Breast cancer, or any cancer for that matter, requires so much time spent in doctor’s visits, chemo, radiation, surgery, recovery…….it really interferes with your life. I had been encouraging myself, that at the end of 3 months of chemo, a surgery and 6 ½ weeks of radiation, my husband and I could go on a nice long road trip. I love road trips and I love spending all that alone time with my husband on an adventurous journey. I am married to the love of my life, a blessing not given to everyone…… and I am very thankful for that.
My husband was diagnosed with Parkinson’s a little over a year ago. He has been so supportive of me during the cancer battle and I have been supportive of him as we’ve been figuring out how to walk out this Parkinson’s thing. I am thankful we are “there” for each other. On Monday, when we went to a doctor’s appointment for him, it became very apparent we would not be going on this long-awaited trip, one, I guess, I had been viewing as a type of “reward” for going through all the cancer treatments for the second time. I didn’t feel very thankful about that……and here it was Monday, when I was supposed to be feeling so thankful. I failed at the attempt to be thankful until this morning.
I’m going to rehearse before God the things I am thankful for. I am thankful He made it possible for me to have relationship restored with the Father. I am thankful for my husband and my children and my grandchildren. I am thankful my husband and I both had good parents who took us to church and took good care of us and loved us. I am thankful for being able to spend more time with most of my grandchildren than most grandparents can. I am thankful my daughters have husbands who are good and who love them. I am thankful Jesus has sent the Holy Spirit to lead me and guide me and show me what is yet to come. I am thankful for God’s provision that has come in so many ways. I could go on and on.
The truth is……and I know God knows what is going on in my mind and emotions…….there are some things I am not thankful for. I am not thankful I am going through cancer treatment, but I am trusting God in the midst of it. I am not thankful for a lot of things God has allowed in my life, but I am thankful for the God Who is my Shield and Fortress, my Hiding Place, Who delivers me from the snares life sends and Who will never leave me or forsake me. I am thankful for Him!
My husband and I are 68 years old now. My human heart can hardly bear to think that we might not be able to take more road trips. But, I have seen God come through for us, time after time, in ways I never imagined, so I know I can trust Him. And…..I’m thankful for that.