Well, we did it. Jason and I watched Noah’s birth video. The pictures below…I got to see and hear them!


Besides one video in the hospital that a doctor took to document Noah’s hypotonia and other symptoms (which I deleted because I couldn’t bear to watch it) and two videos I took of Noah in January where I moved his little lips to a song sung by a bear (yes, I have a weird sense of humor), Noah’s birth video is the only video of him alive! I did alright on the photography side of things, but we didn’t even have any video of him at home during his 7 1/2 weeks there! Second child syndrome…I suck.

I tell you what, hearing his sweet, sweet little cry not only made me bawl but warmed my heart. He moved. Noah used to move…He used to cry. He used to open his sleepy little eyes. He had not done any of these things for so long at the hospital that seeing the video tonight was almost surreal. All the tubes down his throat at the hospital prohibited Noah from making sounds. And the drugs that sedated him. Then, when he was trached he couldn’t make noises either. I got to hear his little cry. I remembered it as if it were yesterday. Noah was awake. He was real…Noah had me wrapped around his finger. I would anticipate his cry at night and run to his room before he made a squeak so I could feed him. It was the most tender little cry…heart melting.

One day, when I figure out how to transfer the video to my computer, I’ll post a snippet because his little cry is darned near the sweetest thing you ever did hear. And his sleepy little eyes, blinking, blinking…And Emily, touching him, holding him, meeting him for the first time…all of it…I am so grateful that despite my poor videography skills, I at least have more than a half hour of live footage of Noah.

Thank you for your encouragement and prayers for us. The flowers, cards, emails, texts, calls, visits…It was a good day and a difficult day. Noah should have been in a backpack on my back for our hike today. He would have loved the funny sounds Em and I made as we drove on the horrible washboard dirt road up to the trail head. He would have enjoyed letting go of the 2 dozen colorful balloons on the mountain top. He would have loved seeing the two deer prancing through the Aspen trees. He would have loved helping his sister catch and release the two beautiful blue miniature butterflies. Em said he would have liked her chocolate ice cream cone.
Even though these are great things, real things, things kids love and enjoy, I know Noah is not missing out on anything. WE are the ones missing out on the so much more that he is living.



12 Responses

  1. oh girl… that is so precious.. I’m thanking the Lord for that video that can remind your heart of the precious sounds of your darling boy… how beautiful. One day we’ll all celebrate his life together around the thrown. We’ll hear his beautiful laughter and dance with the King!!!

  2. Adrienne: At our time, we live in Fla I tried my darndest to get the cupcakes lit at 6:27, that’s the time sweet boy was born right?
    Anyway we were a few mins late BUT we sang Happy Birthday to Noah and said a prayer for him after dinner last night.
    Know you are prayed for here in our house……

  3. So interesting that you urged us to video our kids!! I haven’t used my video camera in so long…I can’t even remember the last time. And I was just thinking that I should sell it because surely pictures are enough…
    You changed my mind. 🙂
    Glad you had a good day of remembering in the mountains.

  4. Same here, we were just saying how we need to get the video camera out and now I’m going to make darn sure we do!

    Happy Birthday, Mr. Noah!!!!!!!

  5. We too need to start videotaping more than we do. I am glad that you have that little piece of Noah that you can still watch and hear him. I’m glad you had a wonderful day in the mountains but sad you were minus one important person. I’m sure he is having a splendid time with Grandpa Steve and all the other loved ones from your family that are in heaven with him.

  6. I’m so glad you and your family had a good time in the mountains! I was thinking and praying for you guys off and on yesterday. I’m going to start using the video camera more. Right now, it’s sitting on a shelf with a run down battery. Time to re-charge it!! Thanks for reminding me:) Melissa

  7. Thanks for the “unsolicited advice”….I will charge up our camera and use it this weekend! A wonderful celebration for Noah. And I do hope you can post that video. Not that I want to bawl like crazy, which I will, but I want to see him blinking and hear him cry…to know him just a little better.

  8. Adrienne, We’ve been gone all week, so I’m just catching up on all your recent posts. . . and rejoicing with you in the precious gifts of the blankie that smelled like Noah and the video you found. I’m also glad that the three of you enjoyed such a sweet time on Noah’s birthday. With continued prayers for your family, Erika 🙂

  9. Every time I hear the U2 song on the radio, “Beautiful Day” I think of your sweet little boy. I heard it once while on vacation this past week and thought about him and your family while the song played. Reading about Noah’s life and his journey to be with God somehow stirs up feelings in me that I cannot put to words.


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