These are pictures of Noah’s first bath at the hospital when he was born. Both my kids could be bawling one minute and then peaceful and sleeping the next. When we took Em in for the heel prick genetic screening at 2 weeks she bawled so hard, she passed out. Noah cried, too, but they actually couldn’t get his blood at the lab so we had to go over to the hospital lab where he was born and have someone else draw it who specializes in infants.
Anyway, the reason I mention this is that floods of memories and visions have come in the last two days. Yesterday I went in for my ‘annual’. I hadn’t been in the building for 8 months now and when I had, Noah was with me. One of the doctors asked if Noah was okay? I said that we were going in that afternoon for an appointment with a neurologist at Children’s to have him checked out…that was August 2nd.
I had a good visit with my doc and got a hug from one of the girls on staff there that we love. It wasn’t traumatic or difficult to go in there, just surreal, I guess. I always would take Em to my appointments so she could see ‘the girls’ and get a piece of candy on the way out. It was good to see some familiar faces. (It wasn’t good to jump on that dumb scale again…)
Anyway, today, Em and I headed to the blood lab in the same building as my Ob/Gyn’s office. I had to take her in for more blood work regarding her allergy panels. Well, as we waited in the lobby for an hour and 20 minutes (!), a brand new baby was bawling for a good 30 minutes while the lab people squeezed the heck out of the poor kid’s heels. It took concerted effort on my part to, one, breathe deeply and practice patience, and two, not walk into the lab and suggest they cross the street and go to the experts who draw babies’ blood every day! The ‘Twilight Zone’ part was that the brand new baby was a boy and his big sister was 3, almost 4, sitting patiently with her nana in the lobby, just 10 months later.
After Em got called in, it took them another 30 minutes to draw her blood because both she and Noah were ‘blessed’ with mom’s veins! (I’m sorry!) The guy poked one arm with no success and then called the other tech in to try the other. She was brave, once again, and they got what they needed. Since they had no kid bandages, stickers or treats, I took her to see ‘the girls’ and get a piece of candy up there. The only catch was that she couldn’t eat it today because she’s ‘fasting’ from sugar for a couple days since she woke up with hives from too much Easter candy…which is why we are getting all the testing done in the first place! What is Emily allergic to?! We’ll find out soon!
When we went back to my Ob’s office, one of the girls told me she had talked to my doc yesterday and he told her that we were going to start traveling and sharing. She asked what about specifically. It was a great question for me as I have thought about it some, but it kind of all came together in my heart and mind at that moment…perspective, perseverance, and hope for the joy set before us. The hope of heaven and life in God’s physical presence. In essence, Hebrews 12…every last word of it. I want to share about the hope that we have in Jesus that life is not about here, and no matter how good or bad it is here on earth, if our perspective isn’t eternal, we’ll always be disappointed…There isn’t one thing in Hebrews 12 that does not give me hope and peace, even the discipline part. That part just humbles me to know that He’d love me enough to discipline me.
So, I’m grateful that what should have been a 20 minute lab draw for Emily today turned into a 2 hour teaching moment for mama. If they had had cool kid bandages, stickers or treats, we never would have gone to see ‘the girls’ for a treat and the question that has been bumbling around in my mind would not have been so eloquently put into words by Shea who helped spur me onto this epiphany moment. Thanks! Good things do come to those who wait…
You know I never thought about eternal perspective… Hmmm.
By the way That is an adorable pic of Noah, so cute!!
I am sooooo proud of you and thrilled to watch your ministry. Love you so much.
Waiting can be so hard, but so worth the wait. PLEASE make sure you let us know your speaking schedule. I WILL make it to hear you in person! I think we have a new ministry that is going to rock this world: Hebrews 12, founded by Noah’s mommy! Let me know how I can help… because it really does not matter what we do here, if it does not help others to know Jesus!
I sometimes have to tell myself in situations like those, that I am here on God’s time, not mine. He had a plan for you, and it included going back to see the girls. Be sure to post your travel schedule. The girls in Indiana would stand in line to hear you speak!
Good for you Adrienne! Let me know your speaking schedule! I am sure there are a lot of people here that would love to hear you speak!
I love how God works! One of my favorite passages is in 1 Kings when the Lord speaks to Elijah. Elijah is out waiting for the Lord. A mighty wind blows through, but the Lord is not in that. A huge earthquake shakes, but the Lord is not in that. Then a fire, but the Lord is not in that. Then a gentle whisper…and that is where the Lord is. His gentle voice speaks softly to us when we are waiting to hear from Him.
You have been seeking Him on your speaking topic and since your heart was tender and ready, you heard Him as soon as he used Shea! So awesome.
Post that speaking schedule and the Los Angeles area will be ready and waiting!
I also want to know the speaking schedule!
And, on a different note, I linked to your blog on mine yesterday and wrote how you have spurred me on. I just wanted you to know.
I think my email and link comes with my name for you but if not, my site is http://www.neffets3.blogspot.com
I think about that a lot. “if this would’ve gone ‘the way it was supposed to’, then that wouldn’t have been able to happen” If Morgen would have lived, this baby inside me wouldn’t have come to be… would I still go back and have Morgen, if given the opportunity to change history? Not a fair question for me… I guess that’s why God is God and I’m not.
I’m excited that someone so eloquent and full of honest introspection and not full of “fluff”…will be out there spreading Truth, helping people see their pain in a constructive way.
Just a quick note for you, I’ve listed your blog for an award for The Thinking Blogger. You are an inspiration – your level of faith and love is unlike anyone else I know. Thank you for sharing your life with us.
I think it is so cool that everyday situtations can turn into mini-missions for you. Preach on, sister! 🙂
I sit and cry as I miss our baby boy. I think of him all the time.
I wonder what he would be like. If he would’ve been a spitfire like Em or if he would’ve been a quiet observer. I often think of him as my angel who watches over me, all of us. I try to picture him with me throughout the day. Sometimes it is hard to stop myself from sobbing from missing him so much…usually I just don’t even try to stop it. I always think that the depth of ones pain is equivalent to the amount of love that is there. I love how God’s creations emmulate us at times. One of my favorite analogies to see is that when a river is shallow it rages more, the deeper it goes the calmer it gets. I love and miss you guys!
First the picture of Noah is so beautiful and made my heart smile seeing hime crying in one adn sleeping in the next.
The eternal view….YES that is what it is all about. We need to always look UP not around us
daily and take our hearts, our spirits, our concerns, our thankfulness and our heartbreaks to our heavenly Father.
Bless you Adrienne
I still get worked up about needles. With my daughter I had a midwife in training try to take blood, after the 7th time she poked me without success I said “okay that’s enough!”. I demanded a more experienced midwife. I think I gave her enough chances!
I love the pic with Noah sleeping peacefully- that is the best.
Back Again. I read your profile and I tell Kayla I love her more than the stars in the sky and God loves her even more.
I think your son had the cutest toes in the nation Adrienne. If there are not awards for that there should be. Whats cuter then baby toes?
I’m so sorry it took so long to get Em’s blood drawn. What a trooper, I don’t think I could have been good for that long and I am an adult. Even with Candy.
And you made it through a really tough battle today. I can only imagine the pain with the baby in the waiting room as well as the questions about Noah being better. A truly tough time but as usual you found the good in it all. I think you deserve a nice big helping of Candy too.