So, I’m pretty sure I’ve established that I am in love with Em and Noah. I literally would die for Em and I would have for Noah if it would have guaranteed him life this side of heaven, though I know now heaven’s way better, so, prolonging the arrival of his residency there would have been selfish…

Anyway, my point is that I would do anything for my kids, which I would think it’s safe to assume you would, as well, for your kids. I would prevent any heartache or pain, if at all possible. So, lately, I’ve been so sad because of some somewhat daily occurrences that Emily endures. You see, since she’s 4.5 and quite active, sometimes like a puppy, her legs get going before her body and she trips. Sometimes it’s over an object or her own shoe, but the point is, I can see in her face that it frustrates and embarrasses her. The other day, after a small stumble in public, she stood up and said, “Mom, why do I always trip? Why don’t grown ups fall down?” I proceeded to tell her that when I was in high school and college, I would wager that a day did not go by that I did not take a tumble. I blew out my ankles in basketball, leaving little or no cartilage and really stretched out tendons. I would be walking on level ground with flat shoes on and fall flat on my face. If shrines were erected at every site where I took a spill on the campus of my Alma matter, there would be no place to walk, especially not on the stairs…I told her that when I was pregnant with her I tripped three times, down to the ground, sprawled out on the sidewalk, belly up. She felt sorry that I had such a history of falling. I told her it was okay, that even though some of my spills hurt really badly and I got bruises and bumps, that they went away and I always knew I could just get back up on my feet again. I told her she could do the same.

So, in an effort to do anything for my kid, if you see me in public sprawled out on the floor of the mall or on the sidewalk, or in the middle of a restaurant, twisted and tangled, don’t feel sorry for me. I’m not embarrassed. Years ago it bothered me, but who really cares? As long as no one’s physically hurt, it keeps me humble…I’m doing it for Emily so she doesn’t get a complex. I don’t want her to care what other people think. I don’t want her to feel alone.



29 Responses

  1. I’m so not trying to be the parent that knows everything right now:) But reading your post made me realize that when my daughters (5 & 2 1/2) begin tripping like you described, I check their shoes and almost always they need to go up a size. Just an idea on one possible way that you might be able to alleviate some her embarassment – instead of throwing yourself to the ground next to her LOL:)

  2. Em is too cute! I too fall all the time. The first week I met my husband I fell down a flight of stairs and landed at his feet. Its been a little while so I guess I am about due for another. Unfortunately, it seems that Grace has my balance too. She falls all day long. Please tell Em we are all falling right along with her.

  3. I feel your pain. I have a permanent hairline fracture in my ankle because I tripped all the time too! It used to be embarrassed, but now I just laugh at myself. I hope the twins see that falling is OK, as long as they pick themselves up, brush off the dirt and continue on their path. If you think about it, we all have to trip down the road to Him, because we are not perfect, and as long as we get up and keep going forward, we will reach our destination.

  4. I have been reading your post since the day your angel went to be with God – all I can say is Thank You for sharing your heart and family with me. Here’s a story for Em.. When I was about 6 months pregnant I was photographing a wedding and was trying to position myself “just right” to get the perfect picture of the bride with her bridemaids on a diving board. Needless to say, I stepped backwards into the pool (cold water)in front of all the guests at the reception!! Of course I spent the next hour sokaed from my knees down to remind me of my embarassing moment.

  5. I would do anything for my children as well, makes you see how strong Gods love is for us. He sent his son to die for us. How can that be, I cant even comprehend that. But he did, thats how much he loved us, so that we can have life.
    I said it before, that you are an amazing mother!! CHEARS!!

  6. LOVE that picture of Tara and Em.

    I’m a few days behind on your blog. Just read the last three entries today. Glad to know that you’re still processing and that God continues to be faithful. I love your level of gratitude and the fact that you’re able to see humor in life. I believe that is SO hugely important.

    The blog about forgiveness caught my eye. One question I have always pondered is, “What is the action part of forgiveness?” As in – okay – so I forgive. Now what? Do I hang out with the person and leave myself susceptible to more things that need to be forgiven? I don’t know. It’s particularly difficult in the case where blatant abuse is prevalent – as is the case with my father. I could ramble on with details, but I won’t.

    One thing I do know, however, is that sometimes you have to work on the forgiveness within yourself without any type of confrontation or any type of humility or remorse from the other side. Three ideas that I’ve ran across recently with regard to forgiveness are:
    1. True forgiveness is being able to be grateful for what happened to you.
    2. True forgiveness is letting go of the hope that the past could have been any different.
    3. Unforgiveness is like acid: It only destroys the vessel that contains it.

    All good stuff.

    Continuing to lift you and your family up,


  7. I am reading your blog right now with a broken toe after falling over my 10 month-old’s Fisher Price train set on Sunday. I also received a call last week from my almost 4-year-old’s preschool teacher identifying him as a “toe-walker;” that is the source of his constant state of imbalance. So now when we fall in my house, we will be happily thinking of you and Em! You are such a positive role model, and as we said back in the 80s, you’re such a “trip”! 🙂

  8. Just the visual of a graceful beauty such as yourself sprawled out on the ground cracks me up. I guess it’s just a good example of not judging a book by it’s cover…I would have never taken you for a klutz:-)

    You are an amazing mom, please continue to share your heart with us.

    PS- I’m listening to my Noah tribute CD right now, always do when I’m on the computer…thank you.

  9. I think it is so important that our kids see us as real. You are doing that for Em, and you did that for Noah, from everything that I have read here. What a beautiful picture of grace and mercy your children have seen in you being real with them! Our son had his 5th surgery since july yesterday, and he is questioning things like God’s grace and mercy right now (he is 10 with a deep, abiding faith). I have been sharing with him some of my own frustrations and struggles so that he knows he is not alone in his questioning, but most importantly, so that I can point him towards the Lord who knows his hurt and feels his pain so much more than I ever will. Thank you for reminding me here today that this is a vital part of parenting- seeing them hurt and hurting with them but knowing that the Father loves them even more!
    I have been blessed to read your words in your blog. Thank you for being so willingly used to reach people who may never see you face to face. I thank God for you sister! I pray His richness in your life and in your family.

  10. Adrienne you put tears in my eyes today. I can just see you two sprawled out on the ground, mothers love shinning all around you.

    You remind me so much of my own mother. I never thought I would ever know anyone else on this earth that was like my mother but I think I have come across one.

    You two must have been standing in line next to eachother when God was giving you both your angel wings. Those special wings only the most loving Mother’s have.

    Thanks for the new photos of Noah and Em.


  11. Its just life isnt it though, you fall down and it hurts…but getting up makes you ten times stronger.My daughter is 4 yrs old and is exactly the same, she falls over thin air, and she gets so mad so after 5 minutes of drama and smacking and shouting at the floor(even in public) shes fine, but now my son is just about walking and he’s like like a drunk little man, and its fantastic to see her comforting him when he falls down and hurts himself.Its like he has 2 mothers.Anyway happy tripping…… careful lol x

  12. I totaly agree with you on this one. I would do and say anyhting to protect my little boys. Today I had to have a CT-Scan to check to see if I have a bleed on my brian. So out of my concern to protect my oldest from worrying all day, I told him that they wanted to make sure that I did not knock my eyeballs loose in the car accident. He knew immediately that I was not being totally honest with him. so I had to explain to him what was going on. Afterwards he put his arms around me and gave the biggest hug ever and told him he would be there for me no matter what. He is only 6, he also said that God can still do miracles if something major is wrong. Thank God that my son believes in a miracle working God. I have not heard anything, but I know whatever the outcome good or bad, my Saviour loves me and my children and will do anything to protect us. Just like we do with our kids.

  13. What a sweet mom you are! I love it!

    When my 3 1/2 year old first started walking, the pediatrician was concerned about how often he tripped and fell. He’s certainly gained considerable coordination since then, but I was afraid he had gained that trait from me–I still stumble my way through life! 🙂

  14. Dear Adrienne, I have been reading your blog now since the beg of Jan and prayed so hard for your miracle to come and cried over every entry but i must also thank you and Noah as you see good friends of ours lost their twin 2 yr olds last year in an acc and i was there to help try and resus them but failed and so for many months have had sadness and anger in my heart for God but through you i have found forgiveness so thank you from Aust

  15. My girls are grown and I don’t think they will ever quite get a mother’s heart until they become one. I smiled when I read your words. I get it and I get it deep! We would do anything…
    Em is blessed.

  16. Do you remember the scene from “The Passion of the Christ” when Mary is watching Jesus carry the cross and fall? She remembers back to him falling as a boy…I sobbed at that part.

  17. Bless her heart! I had a good chuckle thinking of you both laid out on the ground. Too cute!!! Sometimes a mom has to do what she has to do.



  19. Tell Em that my 7 year old tripped from the time she started walking until as recently as this morning! Natalie is very graceful when she isn’t falling down!

  20. I’m SO incredibly clumsy, so I can relate to the tripping everywhere! Its a good reminder to me of my human nature that needs to stumble its way to God’s throne. Thank you for letting us see so many pictures of your sweet family. And thanks again for sharing your heart. Also, I really have giggled repeatedly over the “spankin spoons” story. I grew up with those kind of spoons too, and I’m glad that my very first verse I memorized was “children obey your parents, for this is right.” Not that I always obeyed…in fact, I was a little rebel at times, but you know, that verse stuck in my head. And anytime I got a spankin, I sure deserved it and I learned a lesson…and I always knew that my parents loved me SO much because they would tell me. Your dear Emily knows that you love her – it is so apparent! You and Jason are fantastic parents. What a gift Em has in you. May God bless you much this week.

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