Conversations with my kid

Em as a brunette

Hello Kitty lip stick

Self portrait

Post princess tea party picture
Yes, that is all of the picture that I will post of me in my junior prom dress and Em’s fairy wings and crown. Full length photo unavailable. Em actually wanted me to wear my wedding gown to her little friend Zoe’s fairy princess birthday tea party, but that is where I drew the line! Why do I still have that hideous dress you ask? Oh, because I thought one day I’d have a little girl who would want to dress up in my fru fru dresses. I was right… Actually, Em tried on my poofy 1993 heavy silk, did I say “Poofy” wedding dress one day while we were packing up our old house. She said, “Mommy, this is the most beautiful dress! Can I wear it when I get married?!” I said, out loud, “Yes, sweetie, of course you can wear it!” I said, in my head, “Seriously, kid, you don’t know what you are asking! You are NOT going to want to wear this in 20 years when you get married, and just so you know, I won’t be offended!” There are just some eras that were cool, and some that weren’t.
Here’s another thing she said that had me rolling. We were spending the night at a friend’s house who had double bunks in their guest room. She said she wanted to sleep up top, so she started the night there but called daddy after about an hour and hopped in the middle of us. The next morning I said, “Em, what’s up with you jumping in with us last night? I thought you wanted to sleep in the top bunk.” She looks at me quite seriously and says, “Mom. Heights. I’m not a mountain goat!”
Finally, the other day we were driving around town and had this conversation:
Me: Em, what would you think about having another brother or sister some day?
Em: I think that would be great! I’d love that, Mom!
Me: Would you want one from my belly or to adopt one?
Em: Either would be fine with me…(silence)…Although I’ve never had an adopted one so maybe we could try that this time.
Me: Me neither. I’m open to whatever God has in mind for our family.
Em: Yeah, because either way, we’re going to love that kid.
Me: Yep, either way.
People have asked, and to make it quite clear, I have absolutely no emptiness that I feel I need to fill because Noah isn’t here with me physically. There are days that I’d be up for another kid and there are days when I just want to hang with Em. There are days when I feel overwhelmed with the reality that there are orphans ALL OVER THE WORLD and want to adopt them all and there are days when I think about physically bringing another child into the world. I’m obviously no where ready to make any decisions, so meanwhile, I’m simply loving the one I’ve got…

20 thoughts on “Conversations with my kid

  1. I have never commented, not even sure how I “fell” upon your blog, but I have been checking in every now and then for a while. Love your perspective on things and Emily and Noah are beautiful. My husband and I have adopted both our girls from overseas and have started an adoption ministry. If you ever decide to take that route, I am always willing to chat and offer any support that I can! I love how God creates families in so many different ways!!

  2. Never commented on your blog before… yes, I am a stalker here! 🙂 I come here because you make me think about things I have never thought of before and I feel challenged here! I love reading your insights and I LOVE reading Emily’s stories. I think your two children are beautiful and I can’t wait to meet Noah some day in heaven!!

    I read about your open mind to adoption and wanted to let you know that it is a truly amazing experience! We are bringing our daughter home in less than two weeks to live with our two bio sons. We know that God led us down this path and are excited to start this new adventure!! I just wanted to share this with you since you have shared so much with me! 🙂 Feel free to stalk my blog!! 😉

    Blessings to you and your family!

  3. I believe you have the BESTEST daughter ever. In my journey I have come across alot of different children and have many in my life, but Emily is amazing. She is also just as beautiful inside and out as her mother is.

    Thank you as always for sharing. I have some links on my blog about orphans, if and when you are ready to look into anything…even just praying for them now.

    I pray you continue to meet the RISEN CHRIST in all the little moments of your day.

  4. What a cute little girl! Oh, to have a daughter. (Sigh) Although I love my wonderful three little boys, I have always longed for a daughter. My husband and I have thought about adoption. One of my wonderful childhood friend’s family (a great Christian family) has started a non-profit organization to help people adopt from China. Their website is http://www.bringmehope.org They have adopted two little girls of their own and I know several other families who have adopted girls from China. I’m not saying this is something you should do or are even interested in doing. All I’m trying to say is that I know many families in my town who have adopted and were very blessed by it. I will be praying that when and if the time comes, God will show you His will.

    Annie ~ lovejoelr.blogspot.com

  5. And I cant wait till my little dumplings start to talk. What conversations we will have. Love the pics. Very sweet. I saw the other night that U2/3D is gonna be in theaters soon. Have you seen? Thought of you.
    -Shannon in Austin

  6. She is so sweet! COME ON!!! We wanted to see what your prom dress looked like! Whatever child is your next one (adopted or from your belly) they will be one lucky kid to get you guys as parents and Emily for a big sister.

  7. Another adoptive mom and lurker here! Tonight, I’m struck by the fact that God’s design for your life included sweet Emily. There’s nothing like a preschooler (or is she in Kindergarten?) to take an ordinary moment and turn it around with her laughter and child-like perspective on life.

    My own five-year-old was feeling blue this week, so I suggested she do a craft to brighten her mood. “No thanks, Mommy,” she said. “Crafting’s just not my passion today.” 😀 Oh, what I wouldn’t give to hear the conversation she and Emily would have if they were lucky enough to meet this side of Heaven!

    Thanks for all you do to bless the lives of those of us who look forward to reading your blog each week!

  8. Adrienne- (sorry this is kind of long)

    I came across your blog thru another blog, which seems to be the way others have found out about your beautiful Noah. I stayed up really late last night reading every entry from the very first one to the most recent.
    Your entries have challenged me more than I could have imagined. They challenged me in my faith journey as well as how I deal with grief and loss. I have dealt with a lot of loss in my 23 years. But not as graceful as your words would show that you dealt with yours. You have challenged me more by your blogs and as a stranger than some of my closest Christian friends.
    I thought I was just going to read about the sadness of losing a child. Boy, was I wrong. I learned about the Grace of God and the blessings of friends and family and generosity and strength and perseverance. Thank you for sharing your “Emotional” rollercoaster and being so vulnerable. Thank you for sharing what you have learned. God has used your story to bless me and obviously MANY others. Your story is reaching the “corners” of the world and God is getting the Glory like you have wanted all along.
    Thank you for sharing Noah’s story. Your words brought me into your life, and I felt like I was there and shared in the pain with you. I want to tell everyone about him. And how much he has done for the Kingdom in his short time on earth.
    You and your husband and Em are a beautiful family and there is no denying that God is present daily in your lives. I have loved your stories about you and Em and how you taught her about Jesus and the Life and her questions are so wonderful. She will make a difference for the Kingdom as well, more than she already has!
    I am continually praying for you and your family. And I look forward reading your upcoming entries.
    Thank you again.

    Grace and Peace

  9. That was very sweet. All of it! fairy-froo-froo dresses, mountain goats, and the conversation of the little one to “love a lot”. So sweet.
    Steph G

  10. Please confirm that you want ^Noah^ to be/stay on Asher and Jacob’s Friends prayer list.

    Your site is currently listed on http://asherandjacobsfriends.com/17.html. In order to stay on this prayer site, you will need to register on the site by filling out the registration form at the bottom of this email. Please read the below email from Laura the site administrator. Thank you.

    Dear Friends,

    Asher and Jacob’s Friends is working hard to strengthen the regulations regarding when a link is posted on our site. This is for three reasons (1) to protect the privacy of the family (2) to protect our site from legal issues (3) to take a step towards becoming a foundation. It is very important to us that a family has the choice to have their site posted and we apologize for not taking this step sooner.
    We know many of you are facing serious situations at the moment and we apologize for adding yet another burden to your plate. It is our hope you understand that we would not be doing this if it was not necessary. We are asking EVERY family that would like to remain on the site respond to this email by emailing back to Laura: laurainsem@yahoo.com a copy of the registration form completed. We know many of you have been on this site for a while and have made it clear to us you wanted to be added. Right now though, this is not enough. If you never filled out this form, it must be done! Please complete this form by April 8, 2008 otherwise you will be removed.
    If you never wanted to be on the list or didn’t even know you were on it, I apologize deeply. It was never our intention to hurt you in any way or to take away your right to privacy. This is the reason we are doing this now, as we recognize how out of control the site became. We have always had good intentions but we know good intentions is not enough. Please contact Laura if you would like to discuss this further.
    Thank you so much for taking time to do this. Please know our prayers are with all of your families. If there is ever anything you need, please let us know. May God bless all of you as you continue on your journey.
    Laura Lynn and all at Asher and Jacob’s Friends

    Submit your Family
    As we want to protect all of our families privacy, we have set higher standards for submitting a family to the Friends list. If your family would like to have your site added, please email Laura with the following information:
    1. Loved one’s first and last name:
    2. Birthdate (and day they journeyed to Heaven if applicable):
    3. Main Diagnosis:
    4. Location:
    5. Webpage:
    6. Email:
    7. Photos in jpg format if you would like it used on this site (only used for site):
    8. Your name and your relation to this person(s):
    9. Any particular prayer requests you have at this moment:
    ***Email this information to Laura at: laurainsem@yahoo.com***
    None of this information will be used on the site except for the name, website, and photos if applicable. Thank you wanting to be a part of this prayer ministry. We hope that through this site, you will find encouragement, comfort, and support.
    **For any families added before these new regulations, please fill this information out as well. If you do not do so prior to April 8, 2008, your site will be removed.

  11. I just came across your blog last night and ended up in tears over the journey God has taken you through! It puts it all in perspective what your daughter said about “loving that kid”. Sometimes kids say the smartest things! Your family is a reminder to cherish each moment… even on the days I feel like losing my mind/temper or both! May God’s blessing be on your life/family!

  12. I love the perspective kids can give us. Emily is adorable. This age is so much fun. The way they reason about every day things. Sometimes it’s those little comments that keep me sane and bring me out of my “grown-up” attitude.
    I missed your blog while we were trying to get the internet hooked up in our new house. Loved catching up.

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