I was getting things in order, fluffing my nest, trying to bond with Emily and Jason as much as possible prior to our lives changing with the addition of another child. I could not wait to meet my son!
On Wednesday three years will come and go from the beautiful day Noah was born. We’ll take Em out of school for the day and head off by ourselves somewhere for a little quiet. We’ll probably take a hike through God’s glorious creation, maybe pack a picnic, but mostly stop time, at least in our little world, and reflect on how life isn’t perfect, how our hearts miss our guy, and how, through all of it, our hope and trust in God has not waned. We’ll probably wonder what he’s doing, and dream heavenly dreams for a bit…and for us, the respite will be welcomed in the midst of our busy lives.
If you or someone you know has lost a loved one, or two, or three, or more…please, allow yourself or the person you know time, allow for space and solitude, allow tears and allow laughter. Don’t ever expect yourself or the griever to ‘get over it’ or ‘just move on’. Don’t ever put a time frame on their grief journey, or your own. For those who do not understand, don’t expect them to…they don’t and won’t. We, the bereaved, do ‘move on’ but as we do, we always take some of that person with us. Don’t be afraid to do the same. There is no ‘right way’ to grieve nor is there only one way. But don’t forget to grieve because in grief, you look close enough, there is beauty, such great beauty!
And, if your heart is stuck on the “Why?”, “Why me?”, “Why them?”, “Why now?” questions, I assure you, even if you knew the why, it wouldn’t make you miss them any less…