Emily has had quite the social calendar already this month. She’s had a slumber party with her buddy “Luker Jones”. That’s our affectionate name for him, like from the Counting Crows song, “Mister Jones”. Anyway, it was so cute. Actually, it was a family slumber party but Em and Lukers shared the air mattress, the parents all had our own beds. Em loves snuggling, so when I went to check on them before I fell asleep, Em was over on Luke’s pillow, spooning him…little does she know that in a few years co-ed slumber parties will be obsolete.

Jason was out of town all week, so we did things like ate breakfast for dinner, redecorated our bedroom with the quilt that we laid Noah on before the Lord, gutted closets, and went out to eat. The second picture is of our “date night”. Em said, “Mom, I have an idea…how about I take you out on a date?” (Who’s buying?) We went to a new Mexican restaurant up in Stapleton called La Sandia, which means, “Watermelon”. My unofficial review is that it was GREAT!

The last two pictures I’m not sure are legal to post…should a 4.5 year old be up on the roof of the house shoveling ice chunks? Is that safe? Is it sane? Either way, it was fun for her to have daddy time, feeling like a big girl doing important maintenance.

Even though I enjoyed being kept on my toes all week, 24/7 (literally, she slept with me and socked me in the face numerous times, plus, one reason we never started the co-sleeping thing is, she’s so beautiful, I just lay there and stare at her and pray over her. Though that’s great and all, it does nothing for my accumulating exhaustion…) it is nice to have an adult back in the house. We missed Jason a lot and he missed us, as well. It was a full week for all of us, so we are headed to the mountains for a couple of days with some friends for a little down time (if you can call skiing, snowshoeing, and sledding down time…)

We really haven’t stopped since we got home from the hospital almost a month ago. Not only physically, but mentally, either. My brain is awake most of the night. I’m not trying to be too busy. The reality is, life continues in the green light mode, and unfortunately, time and earth do not stand still to relish the life of the one that is gone. Someone called me the day after Noah went to heaven, a single guy I know who has no social skills (Dave, this is NOT you!!!). Anyway, he said, “I’m sorry about Noah. Well, life goes on.” Wow! Well, yes it does, YOU BIG BO-HUNK. You have a firm grasp on the obvious, but get a freaking clue and don’t ever say that again to someone who just lost somebody they love! I didn’t say that previous sentence because I didn’t want to waste my time or energy on someone who is, and has always been, so self-absorbed, but seriously, who says that?! Word to the reader: just leave the sentence at, “I’m sorry about so and so…”



28 Responses

  1. BO HUNK IS RIGHT! good gravy… i’m glad you “called him out” on this one – at least here. 😉 maybe he’ll happen to read it. ha!

    oh- you must tell us all if jason came home to anything more than underwear in the living room – i’m so curious now. 😉

  2. Well said Adrienne… as usual.

    Thanks for continuing to let us walk with you. For me, it’s amazing how life can press on in some ways as it was before… while we have become completely different. How do you explain the guilt, relief, turmoil, and joy all at the same time? I guess there is no way to explain it – unless you experience it.


  3. Reading how you cherish little Em the way you do makes me feel even more excited about my own future. I am waiting for the right time to have my own but it gets very hard to wait. I want all of the beautiful things have have enjoyed and continue to with your own.

    I really wish ALL parents cherished their children the way you do. How fulfilling it must be to have your beautiful daughter to pray over at night night as you watch her sleep.

    As I imagine these things Adrienne I can’t help but see… little Noah sitting right next to you, little hands clasped in prayer, his head down, eyes closed. Praying right along side you. The little Angel watching over his big sister. I have no doubt he is there… watching and praying with you.


  4. Oh and I hope you all enjoy your trip to the mountains. Stay safe and let us know how it went when you return.

  5. i am just compelled to come and read everyday. life does go on but that does not mean that noah isnt there guiding you and your family, and it goes to show that BO HUNK hasnt losy anyone that he holds close to his heart because i cant imagine anyone who has a tiny glimmer of realisation of what is happening in you and your families life would have said that.Anyway hope you have a nice break :)…….suzanne.

  6. Adrienne,

    Great pics, and more great activities… Thanks for pointing out I didn’t say “oh well… and whatever else”… I’ll have to get you and Jason together with me, and my friend Meg (who lost her husband a few years ago) and compare stories on the things people say… unbelievable… but so believable, because we’ve all experienced some doozies… more examples of the necessity of grace.


  7. Adrienne,

    I am so sorry for your loss. Continuing to hold Noah close is so important.

    We lost my sweet Mother-in-law a year ago last October rather suddenly. This last week, my 6 year old Abby, who was VERY close to her, started crying about missing her every night. She was afraid that she was starting to forget her. We got out some pictures for her to have by her bed, and told her stories, and heard a few new ones from Abby (like the time they sprayed an entire can of silly string around the house!). We laughed and cried together.

    I an so glad that Em will have a wonderful place to go to keep her memories of Noah alive – not only in your house, but within this blog.

    Thanks for sharing with the rest of us!

    God Bless!


  8. Adrienne,

    I’m not worried about the pictures of shoveling snow on the roof is illegal…….but…….the pic of Em in that cute little plaid skirt with that big ol’ smile on her face has got to be so cute that ITS illegal!!! She looks like a little “DIVA” hahahahaha!!! She obviously loves the camera !!! It was good to see her with her little friends having the slumber party and I know that she had a blast. You know…I believe the saying is true that “you have to take a vacation in order to recover from a vacation”..you guys sounded really busy. Please get rest and keep us posted!!

    Take Care

  9. WHAT???????? I am so sorry. We say some incredibly stupid things sometimes.

    My husband and I have felt pretty bad about not saying anything at all to you when we saw you at the hospital visiting our friends new baby. Forgive our silence! Our prayers for you, however, have many words!

    Jason and Chrissy Utesch

  10. Adrienne,

    Thanks for your sweet reply. The strength of your family continues to amaze me. Emily is a doll. She reminds me of my little cousin, Emilee, who sadly isn’t loved by her mother like you love your Emily. You’ve inspired me to start listening to U2! I listened to one of their songs on the computer yesterday, and went out and bought the cd last night. They’re music is amazing, I’ve already listened to the entire cd about six times now. :] Also, I noticed that your family released white doves at Noah’s funeral. My family did the same thing at my Grandpa’s funeral. Isn’t it amazing how that simple thing can make you feel so much more at peace? And I have to agree… it’s incredible how they know exactly how to get home – much like a person’s spirit knows how to find Heaven. I hope you and your family have a safe and relaxing vacation!!


  11. I agree, Emily is too cute–no wonder you’d want to stay awake all night gazing and praying. And, although it’s snowy at your house, it must not be -14 degrees outside like it is here…we all have to wear coats while shoveling. How fun to have snow AND mild temps!!! Have fun on your getaway:)

  12. Adrienne,

    Reading your blog has truly changed me. I was on the verge of leaving my husband. I too had a great loss but let it effect my entire life. But now I am putting everything in me to work on my marriage. We sat down the other night and had a very intimate conversation about making God in our lives the priority. Your testimony has shown me that. There is something so special about Noah. What a miracle he is to change so many lives. Your family is in my prayers everyday.
    God Bless


  13. Reading your blog has truly changed me. I was on the verge of leaving my husband. I too had a great loss but let it effect my entire life. But now I am putting everything in me to work on my marriage. We sat down the other night and had a very intimate conversation about making God in our lives the priority. Your testimony has shown me that. There is something so special about Noah.

    WOW! This is really what it is all about! Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow isn’t HE good!! Sherri your doing the right thing you and hubby keep pressing on CONFESS THE WORD OF GOD OVER YOUR LIFE Noah is a huge part in this and isn’t that something? God NEVER does things the way I would have thought. I love to hear a smashing success story RESTORATION is what I am talking about…..I BLIEVE GOD

  14. I’ve been reading your blog for the past couple of weeks, but haven’t had a chance to post yet. But after reading the first paragraph of your entry, I HAD to post. I have a son named Luke Jones, too…lol! 🙂 And yes, we call him Luker sometimes too.
    Praying for your family…thank you for opening your hearts to us.

  15. Adrienne,

    I think I’ll try and find your email address but in case you check this first… absolutely feel free to cut and paste the info for Josh Buck. If you go to greenhouseministries.org you will also find the latest about who to email… and an address to send letters as well.

    God bless… thank you so much for your post as well… what a treat to hear from you personally. You have blessed me so much in the last few weeks…

    Meghan (and yes… those are his real eyelashes! They are pretty amazing!)

  16. Ade,
    These pictures are so cute!
    She is always full of so much life and energy…I love it!

    Ok so if it makes you feel like you are not alone in dumb things people say….after dad died Terra and I were in a car of people and one of the girls in there who had just been at the funeral said “what are you guys getting your father for father’s day.”
    Terra and I still talk about that one 🙂

    Thinking about you guys!!!
    Love and miss ya,

  17. Every one of your posts speak to me, but this one hit home (as have the others this month). We are having challenges with our 15yo son, who ran away one night a couple of weeks ago (taking his dad’s truck), but came back 6 hours later. As we sort through things, life still goes on…and at a ridiculous pace. I still have to work, he still has to go to school, we still argue, I adore him more than ever, but I can’t just stop the world and try to get this one thing under control. Lately I have definitely been “Martha” and not enough of “Mary”. I’ve written down your book recommendation for the “One Minute Margin” also.
    It is so amazing the things people say to those who are hurting. I won’t even go into some of the things that have been said about our struggle with our son, to the few we opened up to about it. My goodness. I’ve now met a few BO HUNKs myself!
    Oh, I took my 15yo to Noah’s services…he was the one who probably looked a bit out of place in his baseball cap and jeans, but I don’t sweat the small stuff (like, are jeans appropriate at a memorial service?). It was a very special service, and I thank you for opening it up to all of us.
    You and your family remain in my prayers. You are an amazing woman of God, and you continue to amaze, inspire, and mentor me through your blog. Thank you and God bless.
    Michelle S

  18. Dear Noah’s family,
    I pray that Noah is doing good in Heaven.He was really special to you. It’s hard to say good-bye because when I was in New York city,I had to say good-bye to my friends,family, and my pets. We had to leave to Seoul.So cheer up. I thought it was dangerous for Em and her dad on the roof but do not be scared for God was guiding them.Your family was lucky that you had a family sleepover. I never had a sleepover. Maybe sometimes you could Seoul and meet us or Miss.Morton and I could go there and see you at college! We will always pray for you and alwaysv remember the story of “noah stevenson”.I love you …..123 “PRAISE JESUS!” God loves you.

    Centennial Christian School
    Miss morton’s student
    p.s. My secret name is”Miriam” which is Moses sister.
    Mirim Mykaela Yoon

  19. Adrienne,
    I have been visiting your blog since September of 06–and have just fallen in love with your family. The story of Noah is so moving, and I share your story and blog with many! Please know you are in the prayers of a couple in NC that are hoping to bring a little life into this world soon.


  20. I just wanted to tell you how much I admire you. My aunt sent me the link to your page and I cant stop going back to it. It must take amazing strength to be able to write everything out on here, espically when things were really tough.

    I’m so sorry that you lost your little boy, i will keep him and your family in my thoughts.

    I love all of the pictures that you have put on here. It really lets everyone kind of feel like the are some small part of your family. Emily and Noah are so adorable!! I am a aspiring photography and all the adorable pictures that you have posted are truly inspiring.

    Ashlee Kern

  21. Thank you for all your family’s updates so that we can continue to be a part of your lives! Your story has touched my heart and I’ve been sharing it with many (by a link on my webpage & blog). I thank you for sharing your faith – it truly is inspiring!

    Emily is such a beauty! I cannot wait for my son to be old enough to take me out on a “date”! What a great memory!

    Thank you again. Your family is in our prayers.

  22. Hi!

    Cute, cute post. I like the pic of Em on the roof with Jay. Reminds me of the time that Danny crawled on top of our garage in MN, and everyone except his family was in hysterics.

    I think that it is tragic how quickly life takes over with seemingly no time to reflect. But, in Noah’s case, it appears that his impact is exceptionally strong. I’m glad.

    We miss you guys.

  23. Dear Adrienne,

    I have waited a month to post, so much sorrow, so much to try to understand or let go of the idea I can fully understand. I just wanted to say I am so sorry…

    Noah is a real person to me, someone who will always be a part of my life, because you shared him, with open arms…

    Thank you. Thank you for who you are, what you do, how you live. You are my “great cloud of witnesses” my “the saints who go before me”. You inspire me to live.

    Warmly…a sister in Christ,
    Mary Robin Gibson

  24. Dear Adrienne:

    I have commented before because your story has touched me so deeply, as I too lost a son after a long fight.

    I’ve found that people often say the “wrong” thing because they feel they have to say something. I’ve been hurt by things people have said to me, like “at least you have his twin.” I’ve realized there is no “right” thing to say, except “we are praying for you.”

    My husband and I have grown closer to God throughout the last year, which has given me comfort when at times I’ve been angry that my little Logan is not with me. And there have been many times I’ve questioned why this happened. I don’t pretend to understand why he was taken from us, but I know it is all a part of God’s plan.

    You’re right when you say that life keeps moving forward, though at times it does seem a lot to bear. You remain in my prayers, and I pray your faith will allow you to carry on.

    Thank you for sharing your remarkable faith and family. You have exhibited true grace in the face of such heartache.

    May God bless you and your beautiful family.


  25. I am recently a new christian. The other day I asked for what deep love truly is. It amazes me how our God is so awesome. My mother sent me a video from “You Tube” about 5 Point Harness car seats. The video did not work for me. Than on the side I saw your video. I clicked onto it and within that 8 minutes I learned that this is how deep love truly is. I have never cried as much as I cried that day.
    I am so amazed by your story. If you wrote a book I would be there to buy it. You have answered so many questions I have been asking. Your family has laid heavily upon my heart. And I continue to pray that you all are comforted. Your family has definetely changed my life. Thank you so much for sharing this amazing story!

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