You know how in a movie when a guy cries, there’s no stopping the tears? Well, the next most tender thing is the heart of a daddy melted by his love for his kids…I loved Jason before we had kids, but, boy do I love him so much more today. I’m grateful for our marriage. I’m blessed to have him not only as my extremely handsome husband but my very dearest friend. I’m sad that so many marriages are torn apart by “circumstance”. I guess the divorce rate for marriages of families with ill children is the same as the national average…50%. The devil abhors marriage. That’s a weak verb to describe it, really. He’ll use any avenue to destroy them at any cost. He doesn’t give a rip about love, and he most certainly doesn’t give a rip about any of us. That is why it is so easy for him to try to wreak havoc on our lives…yours, mine and the guy next door. He hates marriage so much that it is his goal on this earth to break up the Great Marriage of Jesus Christ, the Bridegroom, to His eternal Bride, the Body of Christ, the Church on earth. He’ll do anything to break up that glorious union. He’s the crazy relative in the back of the church who, when the pastor says, “If there is anyone here who doesn’t think these two shall be united in holy matrimony, speak now, or forever hold your peace”, wants to literally stop the wedding, even though everyone else knows it’s a perfect match.
The reality is this…we are all living in “circumstance”. It’s called earth. We weren’t created to live outside of God’s physical presence, but we do, and you can rack your brain trying to figure out why “bad things happen to good people” for the rest of your life, and yes, it’s your prerogative to blame God if you want, but the truth is, this is a fallen world. We are aliens here. God does not delight in our suffering, but He can sure as heck turn it around for His glory by using it for discipline in our lives. He’s the last One who wanted interaction with His creation to be like this. Remember how He walked and talked with Adam and Eve? Anyway, His word says that He disciplines those He loves. What we do through that discipline is another story. We know a really humble man who used to be a big time new ager. He was into some strange stuff. Well, his son was shot point blank by a gang member and died. Our friend made a bee line to the Lord. His wife quoted Job’s wife eloquently and divorced him…I hope you don’t have to wonder which one has been comforted, which one has been encouraged, which one, in the midst of pain, sadness and sorrow, has the hope that is set before him…and who is stewing in a vat of bitterness…
I’ve been chewing on Hebrews for a while now and want to read it a few more times. It’s really rich and points to eternity, emphasizing faith as a perspective. A scripture that I memorized years ago is one I’ll leave you with to chew on, as it’s meat not milk…
“Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.” Hebrews 12:10-11
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22 Responses
AMEN… and thank you. Thank you also, Heavenly Father, for Godly husbands… who are there for us… who love us… who faithfully stand by as our soft place to fall.
I found this blog through Noah’s YouTube video which I found only because God wanted me to. I am never at my computer at 4:00am but this morning I couldn’t sleep and I decided to roam the net. I cried as I watched his video. Then I saw the link to the blog. I decided to see what the life of Noah was like. He was blessed. Blessed to have a loving family who obviously loved God to the fullest. I have battled in the past few years with 2 sick kids (none as sick as Noah) and when this started my husband was in Bible College and I led worship at our church. Instead of running to God as you did, I started running from God and blaming him that my kids were sick and that we were going through so much. I was angry and sadly I have run to a place where I yell too much and never pray and am a very ungrateful person. I cried as I read your blog. I had always blamed God for what happened with my two and yet your ran to Him and instead of being angry and hopeless you were comforted and hopeful. I want to be that person again. You have lost one of the sweetest things and instead of blaming you are rejoicing. You inspire me. I want that relationship. God has used you to give me hope that I can turn around and experience the kind of relationship that you have with him. I want that passion again, I want that 100% reliance on a God that promised to NEVER leave us despite what happens, or how far we stray. I just want to thank you for being used by God. Because of your obedience and love for Him, you have shined your light and God has changed me because I was able to read your heart. Thank you for being real, my husband thanks you, my children thank you, but most importantly, I thank you. I was missing out on my life because I was too focused on me. I have now been reminded how BIG God is and how much he loves us. I will pray for you and your family.
Maryanna Wilcox -singinpraises@hotmail.com
I can find no contacts for you and desperately would like for you to contact me.
My e-mail address is enigma@24.com!
Adrienne-
You are so blessed to be Noah’s mother. He has changed hundreds, maybe thousands of lives. He definitely earned his wings. You must be so proud of him! -Dawn
I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW THAT YOU HAVE TOUCHED MY LIFE IN SO MANY WAYS. YOUR FAITH AND LOVE FOR GOD IS AMAZING! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING YOUR LOVE FOR GOD AND YOUR BEAUTIFUL FAMILY WITH US ALL. I WILL BE PRAYING FOR YOU ALL. I JUST WANTED TO SHARE THIS POEM WITH YOU. A FRIEND WROTE IT BEFORE SHE WAS KILLED IN A CAR WRECK AND HER FAMILY TURNED IT INTO A SONG. I THOUGHT OF NOAH WHEN I FOUND IT THIS MORNING.
IF YOU COULD SEE ME NOW,
I SPREAD MY WINGS AND FLY.
I WATCH THE ONES BELOW ME,
I’M AN ANGEL IN THE SKY.
GOD BROUGHT ME UP TO HEAVEN
WHEN IT WAS MY TIME TO GO.
HE HELD MY HAND THROUGH THE LIGHT,
I WANTED YOU TO KNOW.
IF YOU COULD SEE ME NOW,
I’M FLYING UP ABOVE.
I’M HAPPY FOREVER AFTER,
ETERNITY FULL OF LOVE.
I’M GOING TO SEE YOU AGAIN SOME DAY,
IT’S TIME THAT KEEPS US APART.
BUT IT’S GOING TO TAKE MORE THAN LOVE
TO AS GOD INTO YOUR HEART.
IF YOU COULD SEE ME NOW,
WHEN GOD OPENED UP THE GATE,
HE SMILED AND SAID YOU’RE HOME CHILD,
AND CARRIED ME AWAY.
I TOLD YOU OF HIS LOVE,
AND HOW IT ALWAYS BE,
ENDLESS AND ETERNAL.
I PROMISE YOU WILL SEE.
IF YOU COULD SEE ME NOW,
WATCHING DOWN BELOW,
I SMILE AND SAY, I LOVE YOU
I JUST FELT THAT YOU SHOULD KNOW.
SO WHEN YOU ENTER HEAVEN
EXPECT HAPPINESS IN EVERY WAY,
BUT REMEMBER, ALWAYS BE READY,
BECAUSE TODAY MIGHT ME YOUR DAY.
BY KIM BATES, 1997
Adrienne, Em, and Jason:
The pictures have left me speechless…Thank you for sharing your most intimate moments with us.
This is my first time to comment, but I have been folowing your blog for weeks now. Noah was so blessed to have you all as a family! You are so blessed to have been chosen the family to him!
Your words are inspiring to me. The strength you seek and have found in Him is encouraging. Thank you for allowing nearly 60,000 people (your counter says it ALL) into your hearts to share your journey. Noah and your story have changed MANY, MANY lives, mine being one of them!
I have a 5 month old who, because of Noah, I snuggle tighter, kiss more, and pray more for every day.
If you feel led to write a book, as others have mentioned, you can put me on your list of readers.
Thank you again.
Thank you again for sharing another amazing photo. There is nothing more precious to see then the love between a father and his son. Its easy to see there is more love then that black and white photo can hold.
Just precious, Thank You.
AMEN! and the new pictures are absolutely precious.
i have to tell you a story. as i commented before, i just read your blog for the first time this past sunday night/monday morning. sunday was my birthday and a day that the Lord showed me much.
well, after being rocked to the core by your story, your son, and your faith…
tuesday i was at lunch with my little boy and my sister. a lady walked by us and chatted with camp in his high chair saying ‘he’s so cute’ and ‘so sweet’ and ‘he looks like a friend of mine’s son’….
well- as we were leaving, camp (who, as i have said looks like your noah) was running around because we had let him out of his high chair… he ran into another room where tables where and this man says, “hey little man! what’s up?!” just as if he knew him… then the lady that was sitting with him (the same one that had spoken to me earlier) says this : “That’s the little boy I was telling you about! He looks just like Noah doesn’t he?!” and the guy said, “Oh! I thought that was Noah!”
all this to say that God is working. how neat that i had been consumed with thinking about your family and YOUR noah, reminding me to love on my son a little extra and read the WORD a little harder… and then this person says that Camp looks like ‘Noah’ = don’t think that was a coincidence.
MK from MS
The photos are gorgeous! What a perfect picture of the love between Noah and his Daddy. Your words are so true, the devil wants nothing more than broken up marriages and relationships. It is so important to keep our focus on God amidst our “circumstances”. The testimony that you share about how your marriage only got stronger through all that you have been through, speaks volumes. Praise God!
Thank you for continuing to share your pictures and your words of wisdom. I so appreciate you and and Jason putting yourself out there for the glory of God. We love you guys!
What Beautiful pictures!
I am a pastor’s wife in Ohio and have been so touched by your story and your thoughts. When I read your blog I am reminded that God will neve give us more than we can handle. You must be an amazing person of faith for God to trust you so much! Sometimes I find myself questioning if my faith is strong enough to endure what you and others have gone through. All I can do is pray that God will continue to grow my faith.
Thank you again for being so open and honest!
God bless you!
Nicole-Ohio
Wow…the book idea is still one that I completely agree with and would buy in a heart-beat! You are so right about couples going through heartache, the devil loves to prey doesn’t he? When my husband and I went through a very hard year with our children last year it amazed me how many couples around us were being torn apart. Thankfully the Lord also blessed me with an amazing man to walk beside me during the most trying of times. We held onto each other, but most importantly held our children with open palms for the Lord to do with them as He had planned before they were even born. Thank you for again reminding me how wonderful our Savior truly is!!
Jessica Wilson
http://www.babyjellybeans.com
Ok, I couldn’t hold it in for that pic. Wow! Love you guys.
Thanks Ade, for that post… I’m copying for my delivery to the sister and for reminding me of that great verse… I know there are hundreds of you reading this, but tonight I love that God placed scripture where I needed it most to preach it… love you guys, so glad I got to hug you this weekend…Terra J.
I find myself addicted to checking your blog. The way you write is wonderful. I think you should take all your entrees and make a book out of them. It would be like a Chicken Noodle Soup for all those that have had to lay their children to rest. It is a huge inspiritation and a very compelling story that I think the world needs to hear. The power of faith and its strength lives through you.
My heart has been really sad this week because I miss Noah so much. I know you guys more than ever must have so many moments that overwhelme you of how you wish he was here. As much as life isn’t about the hear and now, it for some reason doesn’t take the pain away from those that are still hear on earth. I love what Em said about waving to Noah in the airplane, how great is that. Just know that even though things are probably calming down I haven’t forgot and I will never forget. Thining of you often
Love you guys
Terra
I posted once before that there are no words. There still are no words, but I have been trying to think how to say that you have greatly impacted me. The pictures the last couple of days have been breath-taking. I, like so many others, appreciate how open and “real” you have been. I think that is what makes Noah’s life so compelling – you show us that you feel all the “normal” emotions of missing Noah, but you also show us that God is big enough to trust and he has been there for you. I honestly cannot imagine a soul reading your blog and not being overcome with the desire to have what you have with God (even if we may not want God to ask us to experience what you have.) I’m sure there is much more that you experience that you do not share, but I thank you from the bottom of my heart for letting me walk, even a little bit, with you – and I hope you feel us giving back to you through much prayer.
Thank you for your words on marriage. You are so right about satan hating marriage and doing whatever he can to ruin it. The circumstances that he is using to try to destroy my marriage I trust will bring us closer to God and each other in the end. Suffering can be used to bring us to our knees before God and teach us to want only Him. I can finally say I’m grateful for the pain in my life because I’ve gone back to God after ignoring Him for years.
Thank you for that verse. It is definitely meat – but that is what everyone needs to grow and mature.
Thank you for your beautiful blog. This is Marcus Nelson’s wife, Emily and your friend Russ told us about your son and this blog. Your words are so touching – your life and Noah’s life is changing the lives of others right now. Marcus and I have had our share of “marital issues” over the past few years, mainly due to circumstance. (like you’ve mentioned in this post) I needed to hear what you had written in this post. It has shed light on some things.
And I forwarded it to Marcus. 🙂
Our son, Stewart (4) has also had health problems over the years due to a genetic condition, Cystic Fibrosis – our hearts go out to you.
May God bless your family over and over. I know he’s using all of this for good. I know you’ve touched our hearts.
With Love,
Marcus and Emily Nelson
Thank you for your transparency… I lost a baby through miscarriage & through our grief, I consolled myself with the thought that our baby was now cradled in the arms of Jesus.
He gives us the peace that passes all understanding. You have certainly been graced with that peace. I praise God for you allowing the holy spirit to use you in such a way.
You’re touching so many people & Noah’s life allowed that. What a ministry.
I pray that in your darkest moments– when you feel the least comfort, that especially then, God will hold you & you will remember how fleeting this life is.
Blessings.
I thank the Heavenly Father daily that I was blessed with a strong Christian husband. And I am thankful we have Godly husbands, who are there for us and lead us and our families in the direction of the Lord. Marriage is alot of hard work and we have to keep our marriages lifted up to the Lord and proctect them from the devil. He is always lurking and waiting for us to fall. My Nannie said it the best that “Marriage is not alawys a bed full of roses- there are thorns along the way- but in the end there is always such a sweet smell.” Her and my grandad were married 75+ years before they went to be with the Father. They died on the same day, my grandaddy went first and then came back and got my Nannie. They were such a great example of a Godly marriage. You and Jason have shown so many people what a Godly marriage is and I thank you for that. There are so many hurting hearts in the world today, I am glad you have this blog and we can all continue to praise the one and only Loving Father. Thanks again and God bless!
I just found your blog, and I am sobbing. I have prayed for you, and I am sure I will think of you often throught today. Thank you for reminding me to hug my daughter closer. Thank you for reminding me what to value in life. I have been too busy. Too focused on ME. I need to get my focus back where God wants it…on HIM and my wonderful husband and beautiful daughter. You have blessed me today and I pray the Lord will shower you will blessings, peace, and love. THANK YOU so much. In Christ.. Malinda